Family Pride’s Blog

With Special Permission from Alex Blaze of the Bilerico Project, we are reproducing this powerful post in the Family Pride Blog to share with all of you.

“Why don’t you just demand your rights as an American instead of asking for Special Rights?”

Transgender Americans are not asking for special rights but for the same rights that other people have. The fact that transgender Americans are NOT treated equally in employment, housing, credit..etc. begs for legislation to stop discriminatory acts towards transgender people. Transgender Americans are not asking for rights that others don’t have. Transgender Americans are not asking to be treated better than everyone else or to have something that other Americans don’t have.

When I began transitioning on the job and I started exhibiting male characteristics, I was fired from my job and there wasn’t a damn thing I could do about it. I was told by every lawyer that I did not have a case because there was no law to protect transgender people from being fired in the Commonwealth of Massachusetts.

I was not fired because of real or perceived sexual orientation but I was fired specifically based on my gender expression. The Human Resource department was very careful in being explicit as to why I was being fired. My story of anti-transgender discrimination isn’t unique, there are hundreds just like it. So I ask you, where do we go to demand these rights? Where exactly was I supposed to go to demand justice for losing a job where I had spent years working holidays and weekends, sacrificing time that could have been spent with my family?

Demanding your rights as an American and not Special Rights for Hate Crimes Victims and Survivors. “A Murder is a Murder, shouldn’t we all be treated the same?”

Where was Robert Eads supposed to go to demand his rights when no doctor would treat him because he was a transman? As a result, he died with ovarian cancer.

Where was Chanelle Pickett supposed to go to demand her rights when she was brutally murdered by William Palmer, only to have her family, friends and a whole community watch him get sentenced to 2 years in prison, the maximum sentence for assault and battery?

Where was my aunt, Debra Forte supposed to go to demand her rights when she was beaten, strangled, stabbed three times in the chest, and every bone in her neck was broken by her killer, Michael Thompson? Thompson ran from the police and then turned himself in 2 weeks later only to be let out on bail. Where was my family supposed to go to demand compassion when the police came to my house and repeatedly referred to my aunt as “he,” even though she transitioned in 1961 and had been living as a woman for 34 years?

Where was my mother supposed to go to demand her rights when the police told her that her “brother” had been stabbed to death but when my brother and I arrived at the morgue to identify her body we were faced with the horrific reality that she had been beaten beyond recognition?

Where was the justice when we had to tell my grandfather that his child had been taken from him in a senseless act of violence, that his child was brutally murdered for no other reason than that she was a transsexual?

My grandfather died a few weeks later when his heart gave out.

Where was the justice when Michael Thompson plea bargained with the district attorney and was sentenced to 15 years in prison? The District Attorney was afraid that if they went for 1st degree murder that the jury wouldn’t be sympathetic to my aunt’s “lifestyle.”

My family was beyond angry that the district attorney didn’t go for 1st degree murder, and, after Chanelle Pickett’s killer was sentenced to 2 years (her killer was tried for murder 1), the district attorney called my mother to say, “See? We told you what would have happened.”

There have been 8 murders of transgender people here in Massachusetts and only 2 of those murders have been solved. In both instances the killers turned themselves in. There are now 380 transgender people (that we know of) who have died because of anti-transgender hatred or bias and more than half of those murders remain unsolved.

It would be nice to think that we are all human and therefore we should all be treated as human beings, that we should all be treated fairly and that all laws should apply to all of us. The simple fact is that we are not and we are dying as a result.

We are not disposable people and if Congress can’t pass a law that sends that message, they might as well just paint a target on our asses.

This year’s Family Week was my second as a member of the Family Pride Team (this year dubbed “Team Family Equality” on our bright orange t-shirts). It was a thrilling experience to be back—better prepared to navigate Provincetown, happy to speak with LGBTQ family friends I made last year and meet new folks this time around. I was especially excited to have much more time to plan and prepare for our educational workshop series—to have time before and afterwards to sit and talk at length with families who had issues, ideas, questions, and concerns to share. Last year, when Family Pride produced Family Week entirely on its own (with COLAGE providing programming and events for youth), just as soon as I or any other Family Pride staff member finished a talk or presentation we had to zip off to some other location—the beach, the pier, a hardware store, a copy shop two towns over! Anyone who’s involved in Family Week planning and execution—be they Family Pride, COLAGE, R Family Vacations or otherwise affiliated—can tell you that it’s an uncanny combination of dedication to our families and adrenaline/caffeine cocktails that make this week happen. As hard as we sweat, as little as we sleep, there’s nothing more satisfying than connecting with our families face-to-face and providing them with an amazing opportunity to connect and grow.

Longtime Family Weekers have noticed many additions over the years—almost all of which have been tied to the astounding growth of the event from year to year. There are larger events, more partners, and more amenities geared towards families in the town. We estimate more than 600 families attended Family Week this year. That’s a tremendous increase from the 15 or so families that first gathered just 12 years ago! And with that growth comes change.

We have heard your initial feedback from Family Week 2007, and we look forward to hearing more. Feedback is essential to building better programs and activities for our families, and we are dedicated to incorporating as much as of it as possible into our planning for next year. Family Week 2008 is already in the works. We thank you for taking the time to let us know how much you care about this very special week for our families.

In the meantime, in those twelve long months between one Family Week and the next, we invite you to connect with Family Pride in all the other work that we do—advocating for our families through our policy initiatives; activating parents in their local communities through OUTSpoken Families; growing communities through our work with local parents groups; building safer and more inclusive schools for our children; increasing the visibility of our families through local and national media; and providing the best, most up-to-date and accurate research about our families experiences to the world.

Thanks again and I look forward to my third Family Week next August!

It’s only been two days since the 12th annual Provincetown Family Week began, and I’m already astounded by the growth! I’ve seen many old faces and also a lot of new. This year, R Family Vacations is running the large social and entertainment events, like their Under the Big Top Circus Dinner and their Classic Disco Family Tea Dance, and already 3 of the 4 major events are SOLD OUT with more than 650 people attending each one! Last year, our biggest dinner (also run by R Family and pirate-themed) was 350 people. We estimate well over 500 LGBTQ-headed families in PTown this week–that’s at least 1,000 if not more than 1,500 people from our community. The growth is tremendous!

So much has happened since we arrived Saturday morning, not to mention the drive up. (I surprised my boss, Family Pride Executive Director Jennifer Chrisler, with my fancy driving. Hey, that rest stop crept up on me, and I hadto get over two lanes of traffic to get there. Parents understand: when someone in the car has to go, someone in the car has to go.)

We had a great time at check-in and registration Saturday morning, down on MacMillan Pier. We’ve moved most of our events down there this year–both to create a one-stop shop for our families and because the breeze off the water is oh so nice! We busted out the sound system and I plugged my iPod in–I have a special “Family Pride” playlist for just such occasions, with great LGBTQ family hits like “We Are Family,” “Love and Happiness,” “Freedom 90,” and more. As R Family staff handled tickets and program books, the Family Pride staff was able to do what we’ve always wanted to have more time to do at Family Week–talk and share with all the wonderful families!

We have a full workshop schedule this week, continuing the tradition of bringing fresh, valuable education and advocacy programming to LGBTQ-headed families even as we ratchet up the fun side of the week through our partnership with R Family. I’m particularly excited to present on safe and inclusive schools with Jennifer on Tuesday and to lead parents through our “Toughest Questions” workshop Wednesday morning, an exercise pulled directly from our OUTSpoken Families Speakers Bureau toolkit.

Other highlights of the past few days include:

The Gathering for Families with Members of African and/or Caribbean Descent (held at the Family Pride staff house!)
The Broadway Belters Brunch (think bacon, eggs, vibrato)
The Welcome Family Beach Picnic (complete with cool breeze and even cooler water)
The Blogging and Online Activism Workshop (with our good friend, Dana Rudolph of Mombian.com)
The Sandcastle Building Contest (complete with Family Pride ribbons for all the families that participated)

Tomorrow’s our first full day of workshops and entertainment programming, with “little gatherings” for the under 4s first thing, followed by a workshop conducted by Jennifer Chrisler on “Talking to Our Children” about being LGBTQ. Then it’s on to “Relationship Success,” a presentation on keeping LGBTQ partnerships strong, followed by Beach Olympics, the 7th Annual Guatemalan Barbecue (for families with children adopted from Guatemala), and the big deal, big-time Under the Big Top Dinner!

I can’t say I’m not a little exhausted already, and I think I speak for the Family Pride staff as a whole. However, there is a strange energy that develops around Family Week–an energy that keeps a smile on our faces (through the pounds of sweat) and pep in our step (with burns on our necks). The truth of the matter is that there’s no way to explain or describe this energy as anything other than the warmth and good vibes we get from being around all these beautiful families. I’m excited to keep you all posted as we work through the week, and to have other Family Pride staff members update you, as well. It’s not easy finding a few minutes each day with packed schedules like these to share what’s going on here on the Cape, but we believe in sharing our work with as many people as possible, especially the ones who can’t be here.

And now for some much-needed rest…

Stay tuned!
Dustin

It’s Saturday, July 28. That means that the Family Pride team, along with hundreds (perhaps thousands!) of LGBTQ families and allies are descending on the sandy shores of Provincetown, MA for the biggest and best Family Week yet.

Family Week is a fun filled week of workshops, gathering and special events aimed at LGBTQ parented families (you can read more about the week in a recent New York Times article). Thanks to our partnership with R Family Vacations, we’ll even have Broadway quality events and entertainment! So, if you’re sitting at home and can’t make it, don’t worry… we’re bringing the fun and excitement to you through our blog. So, bookmark our blog or subscribe to our feed, and check back all week for updates and pictures. Can you smell the fish-fry already

Provincetown Family Week got some mainstream attention this week as the New York Time’s published an article yesterday about the event and it’s history.

Many people don’t realize that Family Week started as a very small gathering in 1996 before it grew into the mammoth that it is today:

In 1996, Tim Fisher and Scott Davenport, a couple living in New Jersey, brought their daughter, Kati, and son, Fritz, to Provincetown for a vacation. After a week of meeting other gay and lesbian parents at the beach, they invited about 15 families to their rented house for dinner. It was a magical event, Mr. Davenport recalled, at which children of gay parents — many of whom didn’t know other families like theirs — suddenly felt less alone.

ver the next decade, the event — which came to be known as Family Week — grew so large that by last summer a family parade seemed to stretch from one end of Provincetown to the other. Among those working as volunteers were Kati and Fritz, now teenagers.

From 15 families to a few thousand, Family Week has grown by leaps and bounds. But the week’s magic is not deluded by its size; each year is better than the previous. Seeing so many beautiful, loving families is a transforming experience for even the most hardened of hearts.

Provincetown Family Week officially kicks off in five days. Some things will be different this year: our partnership with R Family Vacations, broadway-quality performances, and more robust workshops, programs and events. But the heart of family week will be the same; the magic that is Family Week will be in full force.

Mr. Davenport, who was present at the creation, said he wasn’t unhappy that Family Week was changing. “Gregg and Kelli have been to enough Family Weeks that I think they understand the magic,” he said.

Besides, Mr. Davenport (who now lives in Maryland) said, it didn’t matter if children who attended Family Week went to a fish fry or a circus. What matters, he said, “is that they get to grow up knowing other families like theirs.”

If you’d like more information about Family Week, click here. And check out pictures from last year’s event.

Today, we bring a very touching guest post by our friend Janice Langbehn. She lost her partner, Lisa Pond, while they were waiting for the February Rosie Cruise to depart. In her own words, here is her story:

On February 18, 2007 my partner, Lisa Marie Pond, died from a brain aneurysm. On that day, our family was dreaming of white sandy beaches and blue waters as we were getting ready to set sail on the RFamily Vacation cruise out of Miami to the Bahamas. Instead, Lisa who was very healthy collapsed while watching our children play basketball on the top deck. The kids were brave souls and carried Lisa down to the stateroom where I took one look at her and knew it was very serious, she couldn’t talk at all and had no ability to stand. I will always have to live with the memory of the trauma our children endured by watching as their “other” mom was dying before their eyes. Fortunately, Lisa and I knew sign language because we have had many foster children who had language delays. So I signed and asked her if she hit her head and she replied very sternly in sign language “NO”. That is when I thought it was a stroke or some other serious brain event. The ship porters helped me get her to the Ship’s doctor who called for Miami Fire and Rescue.

The kids and I packed all our belongings and hurried off the boat while Lisa was intubated and taken to local trauma hospital in Miami . The kids and I waited and waited for word about Lisa, finally when someone appeared nearly 2 and ½ hours later – Dr. Garnet Fredrick, a social worker, was very blunt in telling me that I was in “an anti-gay city and state” and that I would need a health care proxy before I was allowed to see my partner of nearly 18 years or know of her condition. After getting his fax number I immediately called Kathy Bowen our closet friend in Olympia who went to our house, found our legal documents including our Power of Attorney, Living Will and Advance Directive allowing me to speak for Lisa in the event she couldn’t. Kathy went to our house within minutes of my frantic call, faxed our legal documents to the hospital in Miami. I then waited and waited – going on three hours when I finally called our family physician at her house in Olympia. WA on a Sunday and asked for her help because I was being barred from seeing Lisa and still was being denied the information on Lisa’s condition. Halfway through the call with our family doctor a neurosurgeon appeared to tell me that Lisa had suffered a massive and fast bleed in her brain and they needed to place a pressure monitor in her head and that other surgery may be needed. I consented. It was only then I realized that they had received the documents Kathy had faxed to them nearly an hour ago, yet I was still not being allowed to see my partner. I also never saw that social worker, Dr. Frederick again. He never came to me to say that he was sorry for his comments or that he received our legal documents and they were sufficient.

Another hour passed before two more neurosurgeons appeared to talk with me and Lisa’s parents who were listening in via my cell phone. It was during this meeting that they initially said that one of Lisa’s pupils was fixed and not responding but there may be a chance. Seconds later, the surgeons got a page, stepped out of the family room and then re-entered to say that both of Lisa’s pupils now were blown and she was essentially brain dead and they would do the flow study in the morning to confirm. It was only after this meeting that I learned that our Lisa was essentially gone, that no surgery could save her brain from the massive aneurysm. After the doctors left the room, I brought our children in to tell them that their “other” mom had died and that she was in Heaven now. I explained that we would keep her on a breathing machine so that she could donate her organs so that others could live just as Lisa wanted it.

More than one tragedy occurred that February day in Miami: I lost my partner, my love, my life, our kids lost their “other” mom and what makes all these tragedies more horrible is how I was treated by the Social Worker and receptionist at that hospital in Miami by telling me I couldn’t see Lisa nor make important decisions about her care. In those 3 hours, desperate for information about Lisa, I paced and watched other families being brought back into the trauma center, yet my family waited, with no word about Lisa’s condition. Our children Danielle, David, Katie and I all lost the ability to be with Lisa in her last moments of consciousness, to hold her hand and to say goodbye and that is something that can never be given back to our family. When I finally was allowed to see Lisa it was with a Priest to perform her Last Rites.

So our family grieves for what was. We grieve for the immeasurable loss of Lisa and we grieve for all the other GLBT families who face discrimination on a daily basis. Lisa and I never set out to change the world or change how others accept gay families, we just wanted to be allowed to live equally and raise our children by giving them all the same opportunities their peers have. I believe we achieved that and in no way deserved to be treated the way we were in Miami. To this day, I am unable to receive Lisa’s death certificate directly from Miami or the State of Florid. Instead I have to ask the funeral home to request them for me because we were not a recognized couple. This may seem insignificant but without a death certificate, our children’s social security and life insurance benefits were held up. In addition, I have been unable to receive her medical records from Miami though I have requested them numerous times. I also filed a formal complaint about 1 month after her death regarding the Social Worker, the receptionist and our family’s treatment – yet I have heard nothing until this week past week (7/10/07) when the hospital said that they had “lost the complaint”.

There was brightness in this tragedy of how we were treated, when the organ donation individuals took over – who are separate from Jackson Memorial Hospital. The air in Lisa room turned to one of love and light. They allowed me to sign all the consent forms to donate Lisa’s organs – just how Lisa planned it. They allowed the children to visit whenever and for as long as they could and allowed me to stay by Lisa’s side until organ matches were made. We are thankful for the many individuals who have been there for our family over the past several months including Rosie and Kelli O’Donnell, the incredible individuals at RFamily vacations including Gregg and Colleen, Cindi, Ross and Adam from GLAAD and most importantly Kathy and Bob Bowen who have taken me and our children under their wing to see us through this horrible loss.

Shortly after arriving back home after Lisa’s funeral Mass in her home state of Connecticut , I wrote this in the memory of Lisa. Thank you.

OUR LISA
Her smile and love of life is left with all who knew her
Her simple wish was to be a mother and A Girl Scout Leader
She was both and so much more
As a mother she nurtured so many
Some for only a few days
Four became her forever children
They now look up to the heavens to see her star shining
As a Girl Scout Leader her troop swelled to over 30 girls
She never said “no” to a girl
Wanting to help as many as she could
Even the adults who “discriminated” against her
Her loss is felt now by too many to measure
Her sons, her daughters, her partner and her friends
Even in her death she gave to others
By giving life through organ donation - as young as a 12yo
She left this earth happy and content
Dreaming of blue waters and white sandy beaches
Signing “I Love You” to her kids in their palms
when she could not speak
She was a partner, a beloved mother to many,
troop leader to many more
She will not be forgotten

by: janice

To read more about Janice and her family, visit her blog at http://thelpkids.com. Thank you, Janice, for sharing your story with us.

We are pleased to bring this guest post by Jamie Lamkin who lives in Durham, NC - a liberal pocket amongst a sea of red. She’s currently coparenting a very spunky 7 year old daughter with her ex-partner. Jamie has always been encouraged to write by many people but believes that in a past life she was martyred for her beliefs, thus causing writing blocks, hiccups and fits and starts in her current life. Blogging has become a way for her to overcome those blocks. Check out Jamie’s blog.

My family just returned from our first RFamily Cruise a few days ago. Our family is a bit different, even from the families on that cruise. Sure, it consists of two mommies, that’s nothing unusual. Debra and I are no longer partnered and we co-parent Sofie, so that’s putting us in a bit of a different boat…pun intended. The biggest difference was somewhat hidden unless you saw the door decorations of our stateroom, then the secret was out. We both had Cancer this year. I’m sure we’re not the only family that’s had to deal with multiple illnesses; however I do feel we were faced with challenges that most families don’t face. It’s plain and simple, we don’t have the protections that many families do.

I’m not even talking about Marriage Equality here, I’m just talking about basic rights as parents and supporters of one another. We ended our relationship before either of us had Cancer and through trials and tribulations have come out on the other end loving friends, supporters and co-parents. The illnesses have been cause for many conversations around all the  “what if…” situations.  Legally, I have no rights to Sofie as a parent. Prior to Debra’s surgery last year, she did put in her will that I was to be Sofie’s legal guardian if anything happened to her. Fortunately, nothing happened. A few months later, I was diagnosed with Cancer, too. That put us both into a spin about life that you can’t even imagine. I wasn’t too worried about my legal rights and protections until Debra had a recurrence halfway through my own chemotherapy regimen.  That’s when life as we knew it changed.

While dealing with a recurrence and “managing” not “treating”  her Cancer, Debra and I are having serious conversations about how things will pan out once the drugs stop working,  her body wears out or she just wants her quality of life back. Those are hard conversations but we keep having them with the love, planning and humor we both engage in with our lives. The part that’s most annoying is all the planning and covering our asses we have to do to make this work. If we were a straight couple that had adopted Sofie together, this discussion would be moot.

I say all of this to remind you just how import Family Pride is to ALL of our families. This is a new concept to me, too. I’ve been receiving the Family Pride emails for awhile. I became aware of them when we were interested in attending Family Week in P-Town a few years ago. I knew they existed, but honestly didn’t give it much thought. I sometimes read the emails and other times they became buried with other emails I receive from similar (or so I thought) organizations. It wasn’t until the cruise after attending several of their workshops, chatting with Jennifer and seeing just how committed they are to making a difference for our families did I truly understand the role of Family Pride in the big scheme of things. Sure, there are many organizations working hard for rights of GLBT persons, but no other group (that I can find) is working for family equality like Family Pride.

As noted in the Family Pride panel discussion, “The Personal and Political,” held Sunday, July 8 on the R Family July 2007 Cruise, it takes everyday people doing everyday things to bring full equality to all loving families. As a member of the Family Pride team, part of my job is organizing LGBTQ parents and allies to take action. Part of my job is also to build lasting, meaningful relationships with the other “full-time” activists in our community who make this work possible, too.

It’s not often that I get to have breakfast with leading family advocates from three of the four corners of the States. The R Family Cruise gave me that chance, since it’s such a wonderful draw for our families–a place to gather, share, rest, relax, learn and grow as a community. On this summer’s cruise we had more leading advocates than ever before: Arielle Rosen, Family Services Manager at the LA Gay and Lesbian Center; Marci Bair, Program Coordinator for San Diego Family Matters; Kathy Kelly, Executive Director of the MEGA Family Project in Greater Atlanta; and Terry Boggis, Director of Center Kids at the Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual and Transgender Community Center of NYC.

I have and continue to work with all of these fine folks on issues that matter most to LGBTQ-headed families: safe schools, access to information on family creation; marriage equality and relationship recognition; fair adoption; and more. But I don’t often get to strategize about how we as national, state and local leaders can pool our resources and make even greater change. We had a great time at our breakfast meeting, visioning how we could reach equality for families like yours even sooner than we thought. We talked especially about how to better educate our own community and others on the many ways race, ethnicity and national origin relate to and affect our families. We’re excited to partner together to create programming and resources on these topics in the near future. And we also spoke about developing local leaders outside of the “paid few.” We have hundreds of local parents group leaders and others around the country who have varying levels of experience and expertise and we want to spread our resources more effectively to those folks, giving the most experienced in our community the opportunity to share knowledge, tips and skills with those just starting out.

And even though it was AMAZING to spend this time with Arielle, Kathy, Terry and Marci, the week just wouldn’t have been the same if it had all been about those of us who already know each other meeting over pancakes and eggs! I LOVED meeting parents and families I’d seen before and especially those I’d never seen. I heard so many inspiring stories (both good and bad) that reinvigorate me in the work I do. As I head back to the office Monday, I’ll be thinking about the difficulties of family surrogate situations, where the birth mother changes her mind. I’ll be thinking about international adoptions that almost fall through and the worry that causes for prospective parents. And I’ll be thinking about the many high school aged children of LGBTQ parents who daily balance both the normal, everyday love and drama of being in a “regular” family with their added burden of explaining and defending themselves to others.

So my thanks, again, to all of you who came on the boat for sharing your time and your stories with me and the Family Pride staff. And a special thanks to the visionaries of R Family–Rosie and Kelli O’Donnell and Gregg Kaminsky! What a great gift you’ve given us.

And now if I could just shake these sea legs of mine…

Happy Sunday, everyone!
Dustin

(This post was written by Sara Leckey and intended to be uploaded yesterday evening, but due to technical difficulties that didn’t occur. So wind your mental clocks back a day and read on.)

It’s my vacation theory that you can tell when it is time to leave by how wrecked your room has become. My cabin looks as if the entire contents of my luggage emptied itself out and decided to party all over the place. That’s how I knew it was time to reminisce about the cruise.

I thought I would give you my top 3 moments (there were so so many to choose from– in fact sometimes it’s hard to tell that I have ever been anywhere but this ship). Here they are, but keep in mind I probably could have had a top 25 list.

1. The Teen Panel held today. There were panelist ranging in age from 11 to 22 and all had different family stories, experiences, and wisdom to pass on — both to other youth in the audience and to all of the adults present. It was a learning experience and it caused audience members to tear up (including me).

2. Watching the sunset over Key West. After spending a day melting in the sun, seeing the southern most point of the United States, and eating key lime sorbet, I came back on the ship to a surprisingly cool evening. From the top of the boat (deck 12) I watched the sunset and saw people gather around for fire throwing (what?! fire throwing is scary, I like watching from a distance so a stray torch doesn’t accidentally hit me).

3. Toddler time hosted by Family Pride (I know, it sounds like I’m making it up — who knew playing with other people’s toddlers could brighten your day?). They played with balloon animals, parachutes (remember the game “sharks” where you get pulled under the parachute — whoever made that up deserves a hug), markers, and a plethora of other toys. Most importantly all of the parents, guardians and allies in the room were able to play with kids while connecting with each other.

Not to mention, the small children sang happy birthday to me (yes, it is my birthday). Is there anything cuter than kids under four singing happy birthday to you? The answer is no.

This post was written by Sara.

Okay, I’ll admit it, I didn’t make it to the island during the daylight hours, but by the line of families I saw getting back on the boat in time for dinner (with sand toys, buckets, shovels and towels — oh my, how much fun is the beach) the island seemed to be quite the hot spot. According to Lisa, the water was brilliantly clear and was made even more enjoyable by the intensely beating Bahamas sun (legitimately, my Minnesota raised self couldn’t be out in direct sunlight for more than an hour before I thought I was going to melt into a puddle on deck 12).

While people may have played, relaxed and gone wave jumping during the day, I maintain that watching the sun go down while riding the tender (for those of you, like me, who don’t know ship lanuage — the tender is a small boat that scurried back and forth from the island to the cruise ship) and all that happened thereafter was the most heartwarming and all out fun part of the trip.

Picture this — look out on a private island entirely full of lights and then step into sand you can sink into. There are video screens, torches, palm trees swaying, hammocks, kids tossing around beach balls — all generously donated by Volvo!– and the sand dance floor is totally full. Dancing the night away with LGBTQ-headed families, allies, and extended family members — to fabulous music i might add–reminded me why we do the work we do. All families should be able to step out on a dance floor (or a beach) and show their love while rocking out to Whitney Houston, Kelly Clarkson or Beyonce.

As a side note Volvo has been an amazing sponsor both on the cruise and to Family Pride. In addition to donating all of the beach balls for the island tonight at 7:30 pm they are raffling off a 2-year lease for one of Volvo’s top- of-the-line luxury SUV, the Volvo XC90. This is the third year Volvo has been a sponsor of the cruise — so let’s remember to thank them for their support of R Family Vacations and Family Pride!